Yup, it’s happened again. Once again I have had one of my social media platforms suspended/banned. Not because I have broken any of the guidelines or terms and conditions, but because I’m a sex worker. I woke up this morning (6th of August) having had my Instagram suspended, but with no actual information provided as to why I deserved suspension. I have had more information since, but I’m getting ahead of myself. Honestly, this couldn’t come at a worse time for me, in terms of my mood. I’ve been boiling over levels of angry the last four or five days, with my temper ready to blow at any moment, so this is just one more thing to add to the melting pot of fury. Being de-platformed has lost me thousands of followers over the last few years, and trying to rebuild again always takes so much time, energy and overall frustration. Having to find your niche again, bring back your old followers and find new ones, reuploading content… you get it. It’s a full job by itself just to keep my business socials running, never mind having to rebuild them every few months. So lets get talking about this particular event and go from there.
After fighting to get access to my account, I finally received this message back, telling me that I have been suspended due to breaking the community guidelines on “adult sexual solicitation” (see below image). At first I was utterly baffled by this, because I have a strict rule about answering messages on my socials. I will answer photographers, other creators and specific friends that I know and trust, but I do not interact with anyone looking to buy content via Instagram or any other SFW platforms. I will send them my website link and/or my email so they can discuss their request on one of my actual work platforms. Regardless, using Instagram to sell sexual content IS against their terms and conditions, so I won’t do it.
I actually have a copy and paste response for these people, because nine times out of ten, they are scam artists trying to get something for free and I don’t want to waste my time or energy on them. The one time out of ten they are genuine, these people will follow my instructions to contact me on one of my paid platforms or via my professional email. It’s an easy way to deal with the situation, and after sending my pasted response I delete the message and move them back to requests. Last night however (the 5th of August) I got such a message, and the guy in question not only didn’t follow my instruction response, but he kept messaging over and over and over again asking for more content, at a more graphic level. So I blocked him. I don’t need that in my life, and I definitely don’t need to be treated like a kink dispenser for someone who can’t follow an instruction as simple as “email me.” I’ve blocked loads of accounts before, but the reason I think this one has something to do with my suspension is because of the level of graphic description he was sending to me. Please make sure you read that again: “he was sending to me“. I get the feeling that this butt hurt little scam artist decided to report my account because I wouldn’t engage with him. Unfortunately, it’s the standard practise of any of the Meta platforms to remove anyone they deem as soliciting, regardless of if it’s true or not.
I could be wrong. I’ve lost 3 Tiktok accounts and 2 Instagram accounts since I started working in the industry… including thousands of followers, and it’s always been something to do with “adult content” that has cost me my accounts. However, I have ALWAYS stayed in the guidelines. There are no direct links to any of my content on Safe For Work platforms, just links to my website, where my blog resides, and my links page that will take you to the spicy places if you so wish. Each step takes an active choice on the part of the follower. There is no solicitation on my side. Actually, most of the time, looking at my Insta, you’d think I was just a model that does a lot of work in sex and body positivity, which is true enough. My main taglines of what my career includes starts with Model, Body and Sex Positivity Advocate, Educator and then (at the end) Spicy Content Creator. It is not the least of the things I do, but it is the one that is a follow up of the others. The main career ambitions include getting my sex therapy and relationship counselling qualifications, then my masters and doctorate in sex education and therapy practice. Dr Kitty has a nice ring to it, and I’d love to be able to take my experience in the adult industry onwards to help people have a better sex and love life… but I digress. Basically what I’m saying is that I’m not actively advertising porn on any of my safe for work platforms, and so I don’t deserve to have my audience cut out from under me without warning or rationalisation every few months.
I know I go on about this a lot, but the cognitive dissonance in society baffles me. Sex appeal is used to sell everything! I mean EVERYTHING. And yet, when we start doing sex education, start talking about body positivity or (god forbid) use our own bodies for the same advertising gain, we get shamed and de-platformed. Maybe I’m too literal and logical a person for this shit, but I just don’t understand where the line of communication breaks down. How is it ok for a fitness influencer to do a thirst trap reel while topless and oiled up, but I can’t post a video about body positivity without getting a close encounter with Thanos? I know so many sex workers who have lost their platforms for much less than that, while other people get away with things that actually DO break the terms and conditions of these platforms. Make it make sense! If we (as sex workers) stay within the guidelines of these platforms we should be treated the same way as everyone else, not singled out. It’s discrimination at this point, and honestly, it infuriates me. I’ve spent all day angry typing this blog, trying to rebuild my Instagram, while also sending in appeals left, right and centre for my previous account. It’s exhausting.
Don’t get me wrong, every time this shit has happened it sets a fire under me that puts me on a creative, furious rampage for a few months. Try and stick a gag in my mouth and hamper my career for no reason? Fucking bring it. I won’t roll over for you. I’ll just start again and keep moving forward until I get where I want to be. End of story. Things are changing. We’ve never been a more sex positive culture than we are now. I’ll keep educating and keep working, no matter how many platforms it costs me, and eventually we’ll see the world become a better place. Or, at least, that’s what I choose to believe.
So, given all of this nonsense, I am back down to only 20ish followers on my new Instagram. Thank you to my sweet friends in the industry and other pals who have already shared my new account, but I need more. It’s going to take time for the algorithm to pick me up again, but the faster my initial followers grow the easier it will be. So if you follow me anywhere else, please please pleaaasseee follow my new Insta (above). It makes a huge difference to be supported by my people and I’m grateful to anyone who shares and helps. So thank you to those who have already, and thank you in advance to the rest of you. You’re good humans!
Love and cuddles,
Kitty.