Once upon a time there was a girl sitting in a coffee shop. She was drinking copious amounts of tea, while pouting and huffing about the fact that she has been suffering from crippling writers block. While looking at the 15+ drafts in her blog she felt completely uninspired to complete any of them. It was like they were staring back at her screaming “finish meeee!!” Regardless of the amount of work-in-progress posts that were gathering dust, none of them really hit on anything she was actually in the mood to write about. A clever reader would inform this poor human that it’s because she needs to write for her mood and stop trying desperately to put herself into a different headspace, but lets be serious, she’s annoyingly stubborn and probably wouldn’t listen. The real issue is that she doesn’t really know where to start or where to finish with anything she writes just now. So she goes up to the barista for another tea (her third in an hour) and moans about her writers block. The barista is lovely and suggests just writing nonsense until creativity kicks in…
So here I am, writing nonsense and hoping the creativity kicks in while I narrate my Wednesday afternoon. As yet, nothing is really jumping out at me. I wish it was though. I think there is this misconception that all people who work in the adult industry must have crazy, horny lives that never stop. In my experience this isn’t actually true. In my case it’s all very routine at this point. Some days are concept days, some are content creation, but most of the time it is advertising, blogging, camming and actually doing the things that build my brand. I keep meaning to get my YouTube channel properly up and running, but for some reason hit a weird feeling of “impostor syndrome.” It’s not like I don’t have loads of things I could talk about. I’m not lacking for life experience, thoughts or things I want to educate in, but for some reason the moment I turn my camera on and start to film for YouTube I pull a complete blank and all my personality goes right out the window. Ironic really, given I’m such a natural when naked in front of a camera, but when fully dressed I struggle to even get started. Human heads are weird places.
Ok, just got another tea and back in from a vape. I honestly have no idea what this blog is meant to be about, or if it’s about anything really. Speaking of my vape, I’m going to start cutting it down, so expect a level of grumpiness from me over the next few months. I’ve been cigarette free for well over a year now, and I said I’d stop vaping after the year point. I’ll cut down then off, the same way I did with cigarettes and see how I do. If need be it might take a little longer, but I do want to get off of that particular crutch. Besides, one day I’d like to have a baby or two, and being addicted to nicotine isn’t something I want to deal with when I’m thinking about that. Not yet though! Definitely no babies for the current foreseeable thank you very much!
What else is going on in my life right now? Hmm…
Is it correct to type “hmm” when blogging? I’m sure it’s probably breaking some sort of grammatical rule, but it’s how I’m feeling today. Very hmm. I sprained my ankle on Saturday while scouting out some new hill sprint areas for running. I wasn’t looking where I was jogging and caught my foot in a rabbit hole. I love rabbits, but in that moment I would have considered turning cute bunny rabbits into a fluffy pair of gloves. It probably has a lot to do with my weird mood, because I had only JUST been given the go ahead to run again after hurting my ACL graft when I was on holiday, so it does feel like a slap in the face. I need exercise to balance my headspace, and feeling out the game drives me insane. I know I can still exercise in other ways, but I really miss going for a run in the evening. There’s something different and very zen about being outside when working out. The gym is fine, and solo HIIT or TRX sessions are grand in a pinch, but there is no comparison to being outside and just running. So yeah, I’m probably more irritable than I would like to admit. 6-8 weeks of no running or impact on my ankle until I can comfortably “hop” on the injured foot without support or pain. If anyone has a medical tricorder handy and can fix this for me, I’d be grateful!
I have a few photoshoots lined up. Mostly artistic nudes and outdoor work. I do love being naked or semi-nude under the sun, so that’s always fun for me. I think it activates my primal side. Oh and I’ll be going up to the Devil’s Pulpit sometime later this month (ankle injury dependant) to to a druid style shoot in the water there. I’m very excited for that! I’ll be a in a white shift dress and we’ll get it all wet and do some regal poses. Think ancient Greek goddess vibes with very cold stiff nipples.
Oh, I guess another interesting update is that I’m on pornhub now. Yeah, you read that right. I took the leap and there are clips of my longer videos on Pornhub. You can go find them and take a look, or maybe have a wank, depending on your mood. The idea is basically advertisement, the same as most of the big porn production companies. Putting up a small clip of a longer video to hook the viewer to come see the full thing. It’s working pretty well thus far. I guess it helps that my OnlyFans, Fansly and other places are quite cheap in the grand scheme of things. Watch me do naughty things for the price of a fancy coffee a month, or pay for each video individually. It’s a no-brainer really! We’ll see how it goes in the longer term. At the moment I’m just working my way through my longer videos and editing them down to the small clips I want for PH, so it may take some time until I have a substantial library on there.
Other than that, I don’t have much to report!
I guess my writers block isn’t quite as blocked anymore, so I should maybe go and finish a few other drafts while I’m feeling less stuck!
Love and cuddles
Kitty xxx